My teenage son felt a lump – he was gone by 20

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Rommie Analytics

Dylan Tombides on the pitch in a West Ham United kit
Dylan was a dedicated footballer (Picture: West Ham United/Avril Husband/Griffiths Photographers)

I’ll never forget the phone call I got on Tuesday July 5, 2011. 

My then 17-year-old son Dylan, a footballer, had been called up to represent Australia at the Under 17’s World Cup in Mexico but he failed a routine drug test.

‘The team doctor said he’s either taken a banned substance or he has a tumour,’ Dylan’s dad explained, and my heart sank.

Dylan was a dedicated footballer; his doctor, coaches, teammates and I all knew he would never have taken anything illegal, so that left only the unimaginable.

Devastatingly, just three years later, Dylan tragically lost his life to testicular cancer – the most common cancer in the UK that affects young men aged 15-49. 

Dylan Tombides/Tracy Tombides
He was excited for his future career in the game, and you couldn’t wipe the smile off his facer (Picture: West Ham United/Steven Paston Livepic/Action Images))

Three months before I received the phone call, Dylan had spent his 17th birthday in Portugal, training with the West Ham United first team.

At that time he was excited for his future career in the game, and you couldn’t wipe the smile off his face. 

Not long after though, he felt a small lump in his testicle.

He didn’t say anything to me or anyone at first as it was painless but within a few weeks that changed so he went to his GP.  

While he could have gone to the doctors at West Ham he said he didn’t want to take them away from, what he considered, more important things – meaning the club’s relegation battle that year

Tracy Tombides ??My son died from testicular cancer
We would’ve insisted on an ultrasound and Dylan might still be with us today (Picture: Tracy Tombides)

This was typical Dylan. Football always came first.

Still, I was glad he was getting it checked and when he was told that it was just a cyst, it was such a relief that I didn’t think for one minute that we needed a second opinion.

Back then I didn’t know anything about testicular cancer. I didn’t know that, if detected early, it has a very high survival rate, or that common symptoms (all of which Dylan experienced) included a pea sized lump, swelling, firmness, heaviness and a dull ache. 

If I had, we would’ve insisted on an ultrasound and Dylan might still be with us today.

How to check yourself for testicular cancer

Movember suggests giving your testicles a bit of a feel each month while in the bath or shower, it takes just minutes to do.

Roll one testicle between thumb and fingers to get to know what’s normal and repeat with the other one. 

If you notice a change in size or shape, a lump that wasn’t there before, or if they become painful to touch, see a doctor.

Instead, life carried on as normal right up until that drug test alerted doctors to raised HCG markers in his urine.

During the call when I was told about the drug test I reassured Dylan that I’d put everything in place for when he returned home to have it checked out. I then spoke to West Ham club doctor Richard Weiler and brought him up to speed and asked if he could arrange an ultrasound scan as soon as we got him home.

Once that was sorted, I put the phone down and burst into tears.

I was so upset for Dylan – so saddened that I couldn’t be there with him right at that moment, to throw my arms around him and tell him that everything would be OK. And of course I was terrified too. 

As a family, we’d fortunately never had to deal with cancer before, so this was uncharted territory.

21 Jun 2011, Guadalajara, Mexico --- epa02787596 Australian soccer player Dylan Tombides celebrates after scoring against Ivory Coast, during their Under 17 World Cup soccer match at the Omnilife stadium in Guadalajara, Mexico, 20 June 2011. EPA/Ulises Ruiz Basurto --- Image by ? Ulises Ruiz Basurto/epa/Corbis
Dylan took his last breath and passed away aged 20 (Picture: © Ulises Ruiz Basurto/epa/Corbis)

Shortly after being diagnosed, Dylan had his testicle removed and a gruelling regime of chemotherapy treatment followed not long after. It was harsh but it meant he was given the best possible chance of beating this disease.

This aligned with Dylan’s belief that he was going to be a cancer patient for a short time but a professional athlete for a long time.

During his years of treatment, Dylan spent a lot of time in hospital, but testament to his character, he was not prepared to lie there and be vulnerable. Rather, he kept himself as busy as possible and would often be seen practising his golf in the room.

One thing he was definitely not a fan of was the hospital food. Luckily, West Ham arranged for him to have a dietitian and have meals brought to him in hospital – the club’s support did not falter at any point in our journey.

However, Dylan’s battle only continued to get harder as, despite the relentless chemo, every 6-8 weeks the cancer would return more aggressively than before, placing more and more pressure on his body.

Tracy Tombides ??My son died from testicular cancer
The West Ham United board intended to retire the number 38 shirt – the number Dylan wore (Picture: West Ham United)

In the end we made three trips to Germany so he could try alternative treatments. We remained hopeful but by mid-April 2014, his organs started to fail and he eventually slipped into a coma.

On the morning of Good Friday 2014, Dylan took his last breath and passed away aged 20.

It was the saddest day of my life.

DT38

To find out more or donate to DT38 visit dt38.org

As we grieved, West Ham provided us with as much support as possible. They brought Dylan home, firstly from Germany to London, then back to Australia. They also took care of his younger brother, Taylor, a fellow player, on and off the pitch.

Most touchingly of all, just a day after Dylan’s passing we learnt that the West Ham United board intended to retire the number 38 shirt – the number Dylan wore proudly when he played for the Hammers.

Tracy Tombides ??My son died from testicular cancer
The DT38 Foundation was founded in Dylan’s memory (Picture: Tracy Tombides/DT38)

That’s an honour only ever bestowed once before, for the great Bobby Moore, so we were truly humbled by the gesture.

As Dylan’s mum, I wanted to do something else in his memory: raise awareness and educate people on the need for early detection of testicular cancer, as well as the importance of insisting on an ultrasound when presenting with issues of the testes.

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From there, the DT38 Foundation was founded. It has gone on to reach thousands of young men through its awareness campaigns, educational workshops, and partnerships with sports clubs and organisations, including West Ham United, to encourage self-examinations and promote best practices in medical diagnosis. 

Dylan’s resilience, determination and love are the driving force for all of us and though he was always destined for greatness, his story can be the greatest gift of all.

Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing [email protected]. 

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