My son is addicted to cocaine and it’s ruining our relationship

Parents and son arguing at home

DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN my son told me he had given up taking cocaine, I wanted to believe him, but he keeps relapsing. 

His mum and I are sick of all his lies, which are destroying our relationship with him. I want to know how to help him quit for good.

I’m 49 and my wife is 48. Our son is 20.

He got in with a bad crowd a few years ago, and started taking drugs, progressing from marijuana to cocaine.

Everything he earned went up his nose, leading him into debt – which we paid off. It also changed his personality, making him irritable and depressed.

We tried to help him come off it – and thought that we had succeeded.

But he’s been going out again, saying he’s meeting friends in the pub for a pint, then coming home high, talking 10 miles an hour and not being able to sleep.

It’s clear he’s back on the coke. Whenever we try to talk about it, he gets angry and says we should trust him.

I’m at the end of my tether and fear for his health and his future. 

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DEIDRE SAYS: Your desire to help your son is admirable, but it sounds like he needs professional support to quit the coke for good.

It will be hard for him, if he’s still seeing the same friends, who are taking drugs. 

My support pack about Drug Worries should be helpful for you to read and provides details of organisations that can help. 

Suggest he looks at The Mix (themix.org.uk), a site for under-25s, with information about drug use.

You need support too. Contact an organisation called Adfam (adman.org.uk), which helps the families of people with drug problems.