I send women my wife’s phone number — then I let them blackmail me

Mike just get enough of being robbed (Picture: Getty)

Over the course of more than a decade, Mike Wilson has been blackmailed.

The 72-year-old has handed over hundreds of pounds to women who possess pictures of him dressed in a frilly French maid’s outfit, stockings and heels, hoovering a sex shop.

But Mike isn’t a victim, he does this for pleasure.

For 16 years, Mike has willingly sent pictures to sex workers online. They’re clear about what they do, with profiles on X that read ‘destroyer of lives’ or ‘brutal extortionist’.

Findom, or financial domination is the fetish in which a sub gives gifts or money to their dom. Mike’s particular findom fantasy begins when he sends his incriminating images – and some personal details – to a sex worker online. Then, the blackmail begins.

Mike’s wife found out about his kink (Picture: Getty Images)

‘My favourite fantasy is being tortured for my details held in a password protected folder,’ Mike tells me on the phone (he also found me on X).

‘There are a load of compromising photos on a USB stick, along with my address, my wife’s phone number, everything a blackmailer would need.’

The blackmailer then pressures Mike to hand over money. He’s met some of the women in person – but more often than not, he doesn’t get so much of a photo. For him, just the exchange of cash is that much of a turn on.

The fantasy only ends when Mike says so. ‘The password is my safe word,’ he says. ‘When they get that the torture ends.’

Although then, Mike says another kind of torture immediately begins.

‘In fantasy you want the blackmailer to be successful, because the pleasure comes from giving them money. But, obviously you need to keep your details safe in reality – only, I actually have given that information away.’

So why does Mike put his life, and his marriage, at such risk? ‘It feels a bit like skiing’, he says. ‘That’s how I describe it. The thrill, the exhilaration, the adrenaline rush.

‘Of course it could all go wrong. You could break your leg. But you could stay lucky, and if you do, what a rush…’

Mike used to go to kinky clubs for this rush. There were four within a few mile radius of his home in Essex, but now there are none. He loved being physically hurt, cock and ball torture (CBT), and spanking with a side order of breath play.

He would visit a local sex worker who would tie him to a chair with a bag over his head before pleasuring him. (Don’t ever try that at home ladies and gents.)

His wife infiltrated his laptop, found their correspondence and told their three teen children what their father had been doing. It caused a lot of friction, although it didn’t break them up.

Sadly he developed anxiety, depression and chronic agoraphobia – a fear of being in situations where escape might be difficult. This drove a wedge between him and his wife, but while the marriage was strained, the rise of the internet provided him with endless new confidantes and kink opportunities.

After stumbling on findom chat rooms, he found that online blackmail involved the unequal power dynamic he’d unknowingly been craving.

He’s a pensioner now of 72,  and gives around £110 a week to his two blackmailers, although in the past he has given much more. He would do ‘cash meets’, which is when you arrange to meet a woman at a cash point, whereupon she would clean him out of as much cash as possible.

Melissa won’t be blackmailing clients anytime soon (Picture: Natasha Pszenicki)

On one occasion, by accessing different accounts, the woman got £1000, and then made a note of his car registration number, which she used to find out where he lived. 

This was an unexpected part of the blackmail for Mike. ‘I hated that,’ he sighed. ‘I hate people working out information about me. I prefer to stay in control, only tell them what I want them to know.

‘At one point it was looking very much as if she was going to turn up on my front door step and tell me wife everything, but I managed to talk my way out of it.’

Although they’d agreed to consensual non-consent when it came to her extorting money, they hadn’t put a safeword in place which is essential for safe CNC practices. This meant she went a little too far for his liking, but it worked out okay in the end.

‘She got around £2000 out of me in the end,’ he added. ‘But I was working, so that was my play money. Money I could fritter.’

As a sex worker, from our point of you, while most submissives like to pretend they are obeying their mistress’ capricious whims, it’s much easier if their kink is blackmail, which involves you giving her cash.

Often men like me to pretend I’m amused by seeing them in frilly knickers or playing with other men, neither of which I find remotely amusing.

But, after speaking to Mike, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m not cut-throat enough to blackmail people, and I don’t think it’s fair that you’re not really giving your client anything in return.

Mike has had to hand over a lot of money (Picture: Getty Images)

Despite this, Mike deems it a bit of a difficult job to be a findom.

‘I wouldn’t want to be a blackmailing findom pro,’ he says. ‘You have to be a mind reader, and you’re always walking a tight rope. If you’re too easy on them they get bored and walk away; too hard, they panic and flee.

‘You have to try to figure out how much they’ve really got and how much they’re prepared to spend.’

He says he’s encountered findoms who have to carefully consider their reputation when wondering how far to push the blackmailing fetish of their clients.

‘They don’t want people to think they engage in kinky play without consent,’ he adds. ‘Playing at it is fine, but you can’t go too far. Girls don’t want to be exposed for non-consensual play any more than men want to be exposed for wearing frilly knickers. That keeps the whole thing safe.

‘It’s like going to a dungeon and saying you want to be beaten until you bleed and faint. Odds are you probably don’t. It’s only fantasy, only a game. Remembering that keeps everyone safe and sane.’

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